Knee deep in Vaginas

i

2011-06-14T11:48:00.001-07:00

been a long while

Labor Day weekend yet here I am....

2010-09-04T08:55:00.000-07:00

I seriously tried to relax and get Bullshit off my mind, but here we go. Craigslist.org has been censored for the Adult Gigs page. AG's offices all over the country petitioned Craigslist to shut down their "adult catagory" pages due to prostitution. As a worker in the adult industry I feel slighted, but it won't be the last time.

I'm sure that shutting down adult activity on Craigslist seems to be a victory over "prostitution" in some eyes. I know it's just some simple grand standing. Something else will come in effect. It's a shame that craigslist was being so irresponsible as to show law enforcement exactly what they were looking for. Soliciting sex is illegal. There was a open forum of people soliciting sex. Sounds like an easy job for law enforcement to crack down on that.

I mean I have respect for law enforcement, but doesn't having a service like craigslist save time effort and money to our officers?

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2003432936_craigslist16m.html --- 104 arrests cops using Craigslist as a sting

http://www.thegrio.com/news/craigslist-prostitution-bust-caught-on-tape.php --- 32 people busted in Florida

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/05/nyregion/05craigslist.html?pagewanted=2 --- NY times article about how many arrests have been made from craigslist. Even citing an Idaho case... the first one since World War II !

I know that other sites will pop up making Law Enforcement jobs harder to crack down on these cases. I hope it was worth the publicity.

Yours in Porn,
King

WTF? What have you been up to? (BOOBS)

2010-05-28T10:08:00.001-07:00

Great question. I have been entirely busy with a number of things that are outside my devious little mind's universe. The world extends beyond naked people. (for those youngin's that would be nekid ppl). I have been busy in the "real" world doing things that this beautiful weather allows. Mulch is my friend now. I also have numerous ideas popping out of my head like crazy so that's always good.

I was actually going to take some time off. Do some traveling with the family..... but the Flyers intervened. Those bastards.

In my previous post I explained the importance of being "Happy", even while at the strip club. I like going to a strip club and drinking a beer, smoking a cigar and watching boobs/ championship sports. I do not care about the regular season. To me it's the same as the plot in a terrible porn movie. Who needs it?

While hanging out in the club a lovely dancer ( not using her name in case she would be mad, I do not want to use a fake name because that could be any stripper... ? What female name couldn't be a stripper's name?) sat down and began to chat. She was talking about something business related... getting this started, getting a site etc. and wanted some help. I could not stop looking at her breast.

I asked if she was pierced and she said no. This girl had a nipple ring that went around the nipple.I know a few things about the non piercing nipple market and asked to see it. She obliged and it was a silver heart AROUND her nipple. Beautiful!!

I told her that I had never seen that style of nipple ring before. I was just familiar with the Janet Jackson nipple shield type thing or the little pearl ones. I told her she should get more because they looked GREAT! I also mentioned I knew of a place should could get some good stuff..... Nipplecharms.com of course.

"PPshhaw" she replied. "You WERE the one who told me about them."

I do not get the "ppshhaw" that often, but I can not remember everything I say especially when there are boobs involved.

"If you used my code ( KOV610 ) you could have saved 10% Psshaw" I replied

"Yeah I did." She said. ( now I feel like an asshole because I am totally not on top of my game. That is where I like to remain..)

That's what I have been doing.... trying to do nothing and it doesn't work..... I like the resting idea, but can't seem to get it done CORRECTLY. Geez, so yeah. I hate misunderstandings and I know I owe a lot of people lots of things.... So I will get on it now. It will be done.....

So I will mention this so I remember I mentioned it..... Nipplecharms.com great boob jewelry... use code KOV610 to get 10% off ...

Yours in porn,
King

I am happy for the Flyers

2010-05-25T12:22:00.000-07:00

I really enjoy an excuse to be happy in my hometown. Everybody is so nice when the sports teams win. I like it too. The strip club is jumping and the girls are not the biggest draw. Sorry girls I can see the look of disappointment in your faces. It's life. There are very few things that will divert faces from nipples, but playoffs will.

Now there are at least four more hockey games people around here will care about. Why am I talking about this stuff on my blog? Most likely because I like the Happy spirit and what it will do for your blogs and sites ETC. Think about that.

BE HAPPY!

Yours In Happiness,
King

Glass Butt Plug Review By Lacy

2010-05-15T15:39:00.001-07:00

Crystal Delights Mint Green Glass Anal Plug From VirtuallyAbout.com

This little luxury toy arrived in a sweet box stuffed with fabulous tissue paper and a few extra goodies. A black case sat at the bottom. The case was a protective pouch and inside was a handcrafted anal plug. Crystal Clear, tapered head and a wide base with a green jewel stuck in the bottom. I mean this is is beautiful. It could fit in the decor of any neat house, but you might want to hide it unless you have really open company over.

I have been intrigued by glass toys because of their look, but wondered if the Glass sex toys were just too hard. When I think of Glass I do not think of this material. It's solid. Really smooth and feels like silk. It is something hand crafted for pleasure. Which I just can not romanticize enough. Artisans crafting the glass sex toys. It makes me smile.

I am not one to use anal toys solo. I agonized over this for a few days. I wasn't sure how I would test this toy out, because I want to be as scientific as possible. I can be too data intense sometimes and that doesn't help with the flow of intimacy. I would only use an anal sex toy like this when intimacy was at it's best. I had to get some help. Which I did.

I tried this toy out while I was getting cunnilingus. The free anal lube that came with this toy came in handy. My partner lubed me up and waited for the benzocaine to do it's thing. Love that stuff; for better anal it's a must! The toy slipped in and felt as smooth as it looked. I was impressed. It is a great Anal plug size. It's not too big and allows you to enjoy the other activities around you, like cunnilingus :P

Glass has moved into another fun category of sex toys I will keep for fun. I am surprised I never used one before. Glass is also very clean, and can be heated or chilled to create different experiences. This is a great toy.

The dimensions of this High End Anal plug are:
1 1/2" at it's max width
5" tall
1/2" stem

Available From VirtuallyAdult.com

Lacy can be reached @netfux on twitter or email.

Cam Girls Ned help?

2010-05-12T17:37:00.000-07:00

I was asked this question:

"How can I get more people to watch my cam shows?"

I love all of the cam girls. They work hard and DESERVE everyone's $$. I do not think I have met a cam girl I didn't like. Seriously.

The answer I give is the same. Use what you have. Cam girls who have some followers should pay attention to those followers and the wants and desires.

1) BE A GOOD LISTENER. These guys will tell you what you need to do to keep them entertained. It's easier to keep an existing customer than it is to get a new one. Ask them what they would like and give it to them.

2) In order to attract new people to your cam site... advertise (free of course). Show yourself on yfrog or any other pic sharing site. Please remember to water mark your pic so people will know how to find you when they want more. Twitter has #boobs of the week, #thong thursday and others. Hit me up @kingofvagina if you need help.

3) Get some new accessories like jewelry (see review here), intimate apparel, or interesting toys
(Great sites BDSM and innovative). Take pictures of these and post to your twitter etc.

4) Be available. Stick to your schedule! Remember you are working this for fun and $$

Good Luck,
Yours in Porn,
King Of Vagina

Happy Adult Affiliate Memories

2010-05-07T02:54:00.000-07:00

I have been an Adult Affiliate for many years now. I can not seem to kick that habit. Starting as an Adult Affiliate was rough, horribly rough. I came through that to be able to make quite a nice amount of money. There were many times I counted my inability to sell massive amounts of sex toys as a personal issue. Lying awake at night thinking... why oh why won't this dildo sell?

Jumping from program to program with the hopes of seeing more money. The only result I was getting from jumping ship was headaches. Missed checks, inaccurate earnings and affiliate managers that were terrible. Putting work in effort into a fly by night is worthless. Remember you are a sales person and the basis of any sale is trust. If the company sucks it does not matter if they offer you 5-10% more per sale. The company will be done before you can blink an eye.

I had offers and calls from companies that offered the moon and sky over the past few years. ONLY ONE survives today.. (Hi Doug! after 7 years there is your plug!)... he's smart he wanted me to work exclusively with him. I can't do that. I honestly do not have the Attn: span.

Before I forget:

TRUST = sales. Try to only use adult affiliates with companies you trust.

Customer Service = Make sure you know their customer service policy so you are not sending orders to some guy who lives in his Mom's basement selling sex toys. (Hey Doug plug #2)

Knowledge = Talk about the product from your own experience. Do not re -write the description that is on the sales pitch page. Seriously. Hint: Talk about the way it smells.

I mostly use Adam&Eve, Amazon, Ebay and Adult Friend Finder . I love the concept of Ebay and Amazon...Power to the people!

Adam&Eve was one of the first stores I ever ordered from and I have great memories of myself and the Queen reading their catalogue ( For the benefit of those 19 - 20 year olds-- Cat a log Paper produced with images that was sent in the mail so people could shop for sex toys.)

There is something lost when everything goes digital. I loved when there was a circled item in the pages... or a folded page.... Great memories.
Adam&Eve's prices are not always the lowest, but NOBODY beats their customer service at their size.

Adult Friend Finder is another one that I have used personally. I know, I know this month something is better and next month something else will be the best. I have used Adult Friend Finder it's a program I have used and liked.

If you are an Adult Affiliate and want some help, conversation, or that motivation everyone needs shout out to me @kingofvagina on twitter. If you sign up for the Adam&Eve I will have a vested interest in you. F*&KING VESTED. You really can't get better than VESTED. I will get some 1" buttons made up that say F*&KING VESTED.

If you sign up for the Adam&EVE affiliate program here and let me know on Twitter I will send you a 1" button that say F*&KING VESTED.

It's FREE to Sign up and we will take over the small part of the world!!!

Yours in Porn,

KingOfVagina

Foot fetish ? Smoot Fetish

2010-05-06T06:08:00.000-07:00

In my travels this week I met up with a fabulous web cam model who went on and on about her great feet. I want to bring some great feet to a new site I will launching sometime. Actually re- launching so most of you know the deal there.

I know I'm nuts. The Queen has to deal with that all the time so it's OK.

Do you like feet? Let me know what you are into. I do not get into the feet so much, but apparently this pose is very hot. Is it? Who the hell knows?

Have a great Thursday,
Yours in Porn

King of Vagina

More lesbian action

2010-05-04T17:16:00.000-07:00

LadiesKissLadies @ FerroNetwork

Show less get more for your site/blog

2010-05-04T03:36:00.000-07:00

I was checking out some blogs and I have to give a creative nod to @netfux. She has a few contest blogs running best boobs, best cock, best vagina of the week. I noticed that the winners have been the cock/ boobs that were covered giving a taste/tease for the imagination to run wild.

I also noticed that only one contestant put a link to their twitter on the pic. That was @bubblepoppa. What a SMART idea. Getting free advertising for your site/blog! If you have a cam/toy/erotic blog and aren't afraid to show something.. put your url in your pic.

Get people excited about your sites for free. Share the love.

Yours in Porn,
King of Vagina

Nice girl in Nylons

2010-05-01T14:47:00.000-07:00

Lesbian sex on steps!

2010-04-29T16:35:00.000-07:00

Lesbian sex on the steps...

LickSonic @ FerroNetwork :: Sample Gallery

LickSonic @ FerroNetwork
Check Official Reviews to learn more about FerroNetwork sites

Non Piercing clit Jewelry

2010-04-27T08:59:00.001-07:00

All the Fun with none of the Hassle!

Non Piercing Clit Jewelry caught my eye a few months back and I had to purchase some. I chose to buy from Nipplecharms.com simply because they have a mission statement that states they started their business because they weren't satisfied by the other intimate jewelry on the market.

I always like free stuff, but I often support adult/lifestyle/WTF am I today? friendly businesses when I find them. I oredered the Cleopatra clit clip jewelry & the Intimate Clip Jewelry with the bells which is a NippleCharms.com Exclusive! I must say the customer service was fantastic. I knew where my stuff was from the time I ordered until it arrived at my door. (moat?.... I should have a moat.) The items were just as they appeared on their site.

I was very excited to give the Queen some jewelry. Woman always love jewelry, and if you love your lover's pussy then clit jewelry is a classic win - win solution for gift giving. Unless you never see the vagazzle , then there could be problems, but this gift would give you that hint.... so.... it's still a win-win gift for your lover. It could be a win-win-win gift if you are a lesbian because you could share the clit clip jewelry. If you are in an open relationship the possibilities are endless.

The jewelry really lives up to the promises. Who wouldn't want to see your lover's

clit vagazzled? Without the pain and healing times form clit piercing it's fantastic! I LOVE THE BELLS! They are so sweet. You hear little jingles and you know where they are coming from so you get to think lovely thoughts of your lover's vagina. Vaginas should have bells attached more often. This way everyone would stop to listen to the vagina bells. I would place them on windchimes near my moat so I could hear the fabulous vagina bells.

I am totally for this non piercing clit jewelry. I give their service and style an A+. If you are looking for that gift for your wife or girlfriend you can't go wrong with getting some intimate jewelry. Make sure you don't get crap and get some from Nipplecharms.com they are also on twitter @nipplecharms so follow them and ask questions if you have any.

USE CODE KOV610 during the month of JUNE for 10% off your order!!

Clitoral Pump Review By Lacy

2010-04-25T15:58:00.000-07:00

Vibrating Clitoral Sucker Pump

I was very excited to give the "Vibrating Clitoral Sucker Pump" a test run. I thought the name was a bit weird, but that is it's actual catalog name in theadulttoyshoppe.com.

The package is deliciously seductive with a hot model displaying her joy for her clit sucker! I was also surprised to find the clit sucker came with a free blindfold! I always like getting free things. It reminded me of the prizes in cereal boxes.

With my prize blindfold in hand I opened the clit pump's plastic and went to the task of installing the batteries in the vibrator. This toy uses the little watch type batteries and that can be annoying if you need to replace the batteries often.

I applied a little lube and went to work testing this clit sucker

vibrator. The clit sucker takes a little positioning help to get the feeling going, once it's over your clit you can feel it doing a decent job. I was impressed by the suction on the tip. You can vary the rate of suction by squeezing quickly and slowly, which makes forn an enjoyable time. If you squeeze slowly and pull away from yourself you can have some funny noises. These fart sounds made me laugh so much that I got distracted from the objective of pleasuring myself.

The toy has a powerful suction and lives up to the "hands free" claim, it is powerful enough to stay in place without any help. But it does not satisfy on its own. The vibrator should make this toy more satisfying; however, the vibration was too mellow for my taste. This toy could have potential with a stronger vibrator.

I would say this toy is a great clit pump, but not a good clit vibrator. I would have to use a stronger vibrator to make this work for me.

The Vibrating Clitoral Sucker Pump is available from Theadulttoyshoppe.com

Lacy can be reached email or @netfux on twitter.

Save 33% OFF SEX TOYS FREE STUFF!!

2010-04-15T06:51:00.000-07:00

SAVE 33% off your total order USE CODE 33ORDER at checkout!

Hurry This Ends on APRIL 17th 11:59 pm est.

This WaterProof Rabbit vibrator will only be $31 AMAZING!! GREAT SALE!

SAVE 33% off your total order USE CODE 33ORDER at checkout!

I know you are probably thinking that this sale is going on with some fly by night crap website.... Nope. ADAM&EVE

YES that ADAM&EVE is having a SALE! 33% off YOUR TOTAL ORDER!

Get SOME TONIGHT!!! And SAVE!!!!

Feeling like I need a Nurse... Like this one :)

2010-04-13T08:32:00.000-07:00

SecretaryPantyhose @ FerroNetwork

Lovely Lesbian Lickfest

2010-04-12T08:33:00.000-07:00

Liking Lovely Lesbians Lusciously Licking LA LA LA! Happy Monday everybody! I hope your wether is nice and you are not too hung over etc. To see more of these lovely Lesbians click here.

Saturday Night ANAL VIDEO

2010-04-10T18:14:00.001-07:00

AnalSaga @ FerroNetwork

Lesbian State of mind I guess..

2010-04-09T10:27:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I get like that do you? See more here.

Nice Strap On Lesbian pic

2010-04-09T09:54:00.000-07:00

Swinger Jewelry (show you preference)

2010-04-08T06:25:00.001-07:00

How do I meet other's who are in the Lifestyle?

Show your Lifestyle preference...

How do I open communication with potential couples?

Show your Partner Preference.....

Two questions that seem to pop up over and over again in the Swinger community.

The answer is simple

Show your Lifestyle preference...
Show your Partner Preference.....

I know what you're saying,
"Hey Jerk, not all of us can go around with a sign on our back saying, "WE ARE SWINGERS." What should WE do BUY a t Shirt?"

No.

An ankle bracelet works just as well.

Swinger Jewelry from NippleCharms are fantastic for those of us in the Lifestyle who like showing pride in ourselves.

Ever wish there was a subtle way to let the "vanilla" crowd you have a different Swinging side?

These cleverly designed bracelets will let you be open and discreet at the same time! You do not have to let everybody know what the bracelet means.

Let everyone see your preference MFM, FMF, MFFM. New connection possibilities are endless! Meet new people by showing your openess to The Lifestyle everywhere you go!

=======> Get some swinger jewelry NOW!! <=========

Imagine if you can take the feeling you have after leaving your favorite Swinger's Party everywhere you go!

Get some swinger jewelry ..... then you will GET MORE swinging!!!!

You CAN with this AWESOME Swinger Jewelry from NippleCharms! Go to their Site WWW.NippleCharms.com or @nipplecharms on Twitter for EXPERT Jewelry ADVICE!

PS....... In APRIL 2010 USE CODE KOV410 at checkout For an additional 10% Off .... Who loves you, huh?

Beautiful Lesbians

2010-04-07T07:45:00.000-07:00

In a Lesbian type mood today :)

LadiesKissLadies @ FerroNetwork

Girls Squirt all over the Place

2010-04-07T07:09:00.001-07:00

Squirt Showers #2. This DVD has nothing but great Squirting scenes... 234 minutes of squirting. This picture is fantastic. I love the gas mask erotica. If this picture does not make you curious to what this dvd is all about... I do not know what will.

It's on a crazy sale right now!
Check it out!

Lesbian ass licking

2010-04-06T17:00:00.001-07:00

Knockers

2010-04-06T06:53:00.001-07:00

I like this picture. Very simple. Timeless.

D- sensitize!!!! D-sensitize your DICK!!!!

2010-04-05T08:07:00.001-07:00

OK Ladies... you know how you get right...almost there. Not YET not yet .a.l.m.o.s.t....Then deflation.

FRuStRaTing :( sux!

Guys if this has happened to you. Or is happening to you. You need to show her your intensity in your commitment to get her off. Commit to cum.... NOt Yet

Not Yet is a lotion to keep you hard. You know how your mouth feels when you go to the dentist.
N U M B
now get that feeling in your Dick. Last LONGER THAN EVER WITH A SEMI DEAD COCK!!!!

NOT YET will leave you not feeling much so you can last and get her off. She needs you to be there when she says NOT YET. She doesn't want you to cum and wither inside her. NOT YET Not YET a little more please.....

GET THAT DICK TO STAY HARD!!! Please your vaginal relations may depend on it!!

Give your hand a Break

2010-04-04T16:25:00.000-07:00

Guys ... how long have you been using you OWN hand to wack it?

YEARS????

Tired of letting girls have ALL the battery powered fun?

NOT ANYMORE!!!!!

Thanks to the KIND folks at Adam&EVE guys have a choice.......

==> TURBO STROKER <====

Before you get all.... I have never had a problem with my hand so why would I want a male mastubator?

Does your hand have Turbo?

Does your hand vaguely resemble a lightsaber?

I DIDN'T THINK SO!!!!

You know what does?????

==> TURBO STROKER <======> TURBO STROKER <======> TURBO STROKER <==

I know, I know... you've probably tried other styles of "MALE SEX TOYS" that haven't lived up to their name........... this is different....

==> TURBO STROKER <======> TURBO STROKER <======> TURBO STROKER <==

The TURBO STROKER is designed to FINALLY use motors to get guys off. This isn't a sleeve. This isn't molded from someone's lady bits... this is a male vibrator.

==> TURBO STROKER <====

It might be the first of it's kind. Look, I know guys have a built in pleasure giving appendage... that is understood. Why would you look anywhere else? I am sure you do not own a car, because you can walk. I am sure you cut your lawn by ripping it out with your hands. I am sure you wait untill it's winter to keep beer cold......

NO OF COURSE NOT..... WE BUILD MACHINES TO HELP!!!!!!!

WE BUILT ==> TURBO STROKER <====

CHeck it out!!!! WELCOME TO THE MACHINE AGE!!!!

The Chin Strap Dildo

2010-04-02T08:08:00.000-07:00

Thankfully. There is another toy that makes Oral Sex that much better.

From our friends Adam&EVE comes the customer inspired toy "Head Gear Chin Strap On".

Apparently, The Accomadator was such a success that Adam&Eve designers held a meeting in which it was determined to create a type of "Head Gear Chin Strap On" with a name that would ring true to the ears of those who were begging for something more when it comes to ORAL SEX.

The RESULT?

ADAM& EVE'S

====== > HEAD GEAR CHIN STRAP ON <======
You need the strap on for you chin...... She's wanted a bigger chin.... but AFRAID to say anything.
You do not want to be left for that special someone with a cleft chin do you?

Or are you that type of guy/girl that would not give your partner the chin pleasure they have craved for years?

YOU NEED TO BUY!!!

====== > HEAD GEAR CHIN STRAP ON <======

Why would I need a chin dildo?

OK SORRY if i offended you.... You are the World's greatest lover and no one can teach you anything... right? If you are uncertain or at least open to the fact that you can always learn more of sexual pleasure....check out the chin dildo.

====== > HEAD GEAR CHIN STRAP ON <======

A chin dildo really won't make a difference in my sex life.

OH NO?
The image of guy's and girl's appearing indifferent with photoshopped sex toys strapped to their heads will change that. Check out the images.... they will blow you away.

====== > HEAD GEAR CHIN STRAP ON <======

If you have been craving for a solid company that makes reliable chin dildos, look no further than Adam&Eve. They are a fantastic company that has been on the cutting edge of sex toy technology. You asked for a chin dildo head gear type strap on and now you have the....

====== > HEAD GEAR CHIN STRAP ON <======

ORDER YOUR Chin Dildo NOW!!!!

You will be thankful you did!!

BJ Strap? Worthless or best sex toy ever?

2010-04-01T07:06:00.000-07:00

The BJ Strap

You are getting a blow job and your hands are firmly gripped onto hair that seriously needs conditioning. Gross, I know. When getting head guys do tend to feel around your hair ladies and if they are not satisfied..... well it might be your last BJ for awhile.

How many times has this happened to you?
It might have happened more than you know. He probably told his friends about your terribly greasy hair only to have them ridicule your lack of conditioning skills.

EMBARRASSING!!!!!

What CAN YOU DO? Get this. The BJ Strap! It's Here. BJ Strap BJ Strap BJ Strap

Girls are you tired of men not doing the job down there?
Eating Pussy is a job that should not be rushed or stopped midway through. Can't get them to stay and bring you to an oral sex climax? Does your partner not finish their meal when eating at the "Y"? Your solution is here.

YES! The BJ Strap can also be used to wrangle tongues towards your vagina. No more worries about a job not done. The BJ Strap is a universal sex toy that will allow anyone to keep a head where you need a head.

You need =======> THE BJ STRAP

Ladies does your man's throbbing member not keep your head upright?

Do you NEED to use YOUR OWN MUSCLES to keep a dick in your mouth? I guess that's why it's called a Blow JOB because that sounds like WORK to me. NOT ANYMORE!!! You do not have to use any muscles. You can be as limp as pudding with THE BJ STRAP.

Just hand your man the BJ STRAP and go limp, Your man will be able to fuck the shit out of your mouth while you think about DWTS or laundry!

Go limp like pudding and still give head! ====> BJ Strap

Tired of using your hands on greasy hair while getting head? ===> BJ Strap

Ladies are you sick of having to use you OWN neck muscles? ===> BJ Strap

Cunniligist quitting midway through? ====> BJ Strap

You NEED BJ Strap.... Why do you not own the BJ STRAP? BJ Strap BJ Strap BJ Strap

Proudly offered through ADAM&EVE

Ricky Martin IS GAY!!!!

2010-03-31T11:03:00.000-07:00

Stay TUNED for other news from 1999!!!! Seriously? Does anyone care about this? Besides me of course? I am glad it's Wednesday!

I find this Funny

2010-03-30T05:57:00.000-07:00

I hope this makes your week a little brighter.

Off to a commune?

2010-03-22T16:50:00.001-07:00

Polyamory. Does it exist? Are these relationships really feasible? I am starting to believe the polyamorists are nuts. The sex part doesn't bother me. It's the relationship part that I do not see happening. I guess this is why I am fucking crazy. I can understand swinging, but lose a little with the poly.

Do people really pay this much for a URL?

2010-03-11T07:24:00.000-08:00

I saw this listing on ebay. Url for sale I am amazed at the asking price for this domain name. Do people really care this much about the domain name? What is in a domain name. It's easy to remember the ad says. I refer back to my days of showing people how to make money on the web. The first question was usually, what name do think is good?
The name doesn't matter. It really doesn't. Think about the big sites. GOOGLE. What the F is a google?
Twitter?
Yahoo?
facebook?

It's all about what you do with your site... not what your site's name is. If you are going to spend that much on a domain name I have a few I'd like to sell you :)

Furry Boobs?

2010-03-05T11:16:00.000-08:00

You have all seen or heard of the fuzzy dice to hang from the rear view mirror. Now finally, there is an alternative to those of us who love our boobs furry. These bad boys will keep you smiling and driving all day long. I guess you'd want these... but Furry Boobs? That's my Ebay find today.

D.I.Y. SEX Toys

2010-03-04T07:17:00.000-08:00

The economy in the US sucks right now. This has led many people to refrain from buying their sex toys. This sucks for those of us who have enjoyed making some money from those sales. I think it must suck even more for those of you who have made the dreaded decision...."should I eat or buy sex toys?"

I hope to bring you some DIY sex toy tips here. I know there are some sites about it and there is this DIY sex toys guide that can help. I am asking everyone out there if you have any tips to share let me know. I hope you have a great day.

The Marriage Ref & Stripper Pole

2010-03-02T08:12:00.000-08:00

"The Marriage Ref" debuted on NBC after the end of The Olympics and people watched. I have never cared about the Olympics and anyone who watched the closing ceremonies probably would watch anything on TV. I am curious about the show....not enough to watch it, but when it comes in the form of a google alert about strippers I'll take notice.

I was interested in this show because I know a couple that was scouted for the program before opting out of being made fun of in front of people who watch the closing ceremonies of Olympic games. A stripper pole invites stripping. I believe a house with a stripper pole should be ready and invite stripping of all forms in your house. It's like a bar. You shouldn't have a bar in your house if you are in recovery. You should not install a stripper pole unless you are ok with strippers and stripping.

I do not know why these shows exist, but they do. I guess it's because people make some $$$. If you are trying to make money online with a site or anything else, let me know on my Twitter @KingofVagina so I can pimp your stuff out there. If you really want you can read my book when it comes out this summer.

The Classic Porn DVDs are hard to find.

2010-03-02T07:24:00.000-08:00

All I could find was "Deep Throat" Aussie style on Ebay

I love those older movies. Great stuff. I guess it's just the look of the film. I'm not sure. Whenever I produce a film I am going to make it look vintage. I hope everyone is having a lovely day.

Lovely Creampie

2010-03-02T07:17:00.000-08:00

This exists on Ebay

In case of emergency.... 69

2010-03-02T06:27:00.000-08:00

How to safely perform a 69 position in a car. I saw this pic and it made me laugh. More things that are better than this blog here.

Spring TIME!!!!!

2010-03-01T11:39:00.001-08:00

I miss Spring.... and vaginas outside.

pluginspage="http://www.adobe.com/shockwave/download/download.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash"
type="application/x-shockwave-flash" height="344" width="434" />

Open Letter to Lesbians

2010-02-26T06:39:00.001-08:00

Dear All Lesbians/ Bi Women,

I am sorry that I have been excluded from some of your clubs, or most recently dropped from some twitter exchanges. We have a common interest.... women. As the King of Vagina, I am interested in what makes vaginas tick and work well. This is a common interest I believe. We should get together sometime and discuss the ideas of sexually pleasing women. I will never exclude anyone from good healthy sex discussions.

Snowily yours,

King

Kirk Cameron Praying for Boner.

2010-02-23T10:21:00.000-08:00

Kirk Cameron is praying for his former friend boner. Cameron and boner were good friends years ago, but have fallen out of touch. Apparently boner seemed despondent and headed off to Canada and didn't even return for Valentine's Day (when it's always good to see a boner.)

Kirk Cameron remember his friend fondly and from CNN.com

(Cameron, who played Koenig's neighbor Mike on the hit '80s show, said, "Mike and Boner could always work things out when they put their minds to it. I'm praying for you, pal. Hope to hear from you soon.")

Hopefully Cameron and boner will soon be reunited. Come back Boner... come back!

Tiger Woods Is a VICTIM of Domestic VIOLENCE!!!!

2010-02-19T08:26:00.000-08:00

I am really sick of hearing about Tiger Wood's sex problems. I would like to focus attention to what I think is really overlooked. Tiger wood's wife attacked him, with the intent to injure, maybe even more. Tiger was in no shape to drive, yet he felt the need to flee from his crazed wife. Listen to this story and see if you agree.

Tiger Woods pretends to be his wife on her cell phone and texts her male friend. After getting a returned text Tiger flies into a rage and begins to attack his sleeping wife beating her as she escapes into her car and frantically tries to escape her enraged spouse.

That sounds pretty messed up. I think that would have killed Tiger's career/life forever. Yes, he lied to his wife, but does that justify the abuse he received? Why hasn't the press asked him to press charges on his wife?

Maybe she didn't mean it..... I mean Tiger was asking for it. He slept around. It was really HIS fault. He should have never left his cell phone out for her to pretend to be him and get enraged. Maybe just maybe she would be kind enough to forgive him and let him back into his life.

Sounds like shit to me. Tiger's a sex addict. I hope he gets help. The best help might be never getting married.

Fine line of Art & Porn

2010-02-19T07:13:00.000-08:00

Art is porn that makes no money.

Just a random thought brought on by this

Thanks via @darklovescarlet on the twitter.

Condoms do not fit?

2010-02-18T17:50:00.001-08:00

I keep hearing that condoms do not fit correctly and this leads to unsafe sex. That sucks. I am excited to see the new line of measurments for the newer condoms that will surely be hitting the market soon. I have often wondered why the only other size is the "magnum". Are we really closer to having sized condoms? Were there really problems like this? I think it's just a marketing scheme. What do I know? Who bought that line that condoms don't fit so they wouldn't use them?

A picture is worth a thousand words

2010-02-16T08:39:00.001-08:00

What is the conversion to vaginas? That is the question in my head. So I am on a quest to figure that equation out. What the Fucjk does that mean? I am not sure.......... When It snows this much and It's MArdi Gras. I'm already blasted. sooooo here's a picture from twitpic.

Snow makes me think of the beach... so Jersey Shore......

2010-02-11T13:02:00.001-08:00

My favorite beach town has a porn parody. It sure would be nice to go to the beach this summer. The place for me is seaside Heights NJ. I know it's considered a "dirty" town, but for this guy who was raised on Wildwood, Seaside Heights is fine by me. There are a few things I need for the beach.

1) I need to have slices of pizza available every 5-7 feet. Not that I would eat at each one.... I just need to know it's available.

2) Ice cream cone availability no farther away than 25 ft intervals.

3) Sea Dragon.....( or reasonable facsimile thereof.)

4) Skee-ball (preferably with tickets for prizes you can work a lifetime for.)

5) MTV presence (beach house in 2000.) Do the kids still do that?

Seaside Heights provided all of these plus a ski lift... which is brilliant or really stupid depending on the point of view.

Now, my favorite seaside getaway includes the ultimate in trash entertainment with the exploitation of young people doing stupid young people stuff.

Just when you thought it wasn't enough.............

Jersey Shore has an upcoming Porn parody. I can't wait for the summer now. Just knowing that a place can be so fulfilling to my every need in a beach town.... awesome. Severely awesome.

More Snow

2010-02-10T12:15:00.000-08:00

I am really beginning to hate all of this snow. Seriously like 2feet today. This is silly. I need some distraction so I'm checking out some CL ads to laugh.

Sarah Palin in Stripper skirt... is she hot?

2010-02-08T06:55:00.000-08:00

I don't think she would be hot even if she didn't seem so crazy. In this video she's rubbing her leg alot. She must have taken a clue from Kelly Ripa, that girl was always oozing sex on her morning show. Palin dresses in a "stripper skirt" then uses notes on her hand... so? This is news.

Check it out. Still interested in political porn? You betcha!

This should hold you over until the Edwards Sex tape is released.

Snowed in Sex!

2010-02-06T08:47:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone! Many of us on the East of the US are snowed in. This can be horrible unless you happen to be the lucky people who are snowed in with a partner. The possibilities are endless!!!! Snow sex... no really sex in snow.... but that might be nice so send pictures if you have them. I am talking about having some nice romantic snowed in time. Nice fire to curl around.... oh yeah sweet times. So curl up today and get off the internets and snuggle with your love...............

If you need someone meet them....

Let it Fuck and snow :)))))

ALERT PORN is Fantasy ALERT

2010-02-03T05:08:00.000-08:00

An AIDS activist group is seeking to make condom use in porn mandatory. Centered in LA the group seeks the County department of Health to regulate the porn industry to make it mandatory for the performers to wear condoms. Such a law will need the backing of the legislature, so far no one has stepped up to back this bill.

I have no problem with safety in the porn industry. Obviously, there will always be dangers in any job and people who do not follow the laws. Porn is fantasy. As part of that fantasy their is no need to protect anyone from the dangers of disease or infidelity or anything else that may happen during real life relationships that involve sex. This would be a difficult move, but I'm sure the real pro's would comply. The seedier productions would still go on and may even force some workers into that arena because of the money that would be offered.

Can this be a hazard of the workplace and would some agency be sent on "spunk patrol"? "Legitimate" movies have it, maybe it's coming to the porn industry soon. That would be interesting to see the people who do that job :)

February Is G spot Month

2010-02-02T07:30:00.000-08:00

Since February has been declared "G spot Month" by those who claim months for objects, I will go on record saying that I do believe in the G spot. There are those G spot mythbusters out there. I have seen reports on CNN and Joy Behar did an entire show about the mystical G Spot. Some like Cnn report that there is no such thing as the Gspot and that we have all been searching for something that does not exist.

Polling women I found that most women say "sure" as the answer for the G spot's existence. I am assuming that the G Spot is similiar to the mythical creatures out in the universe. There are some who claim to have found it. other's claim they do not exist and a shitload of people make money off of finding it. :)

If you decide to go exploring for the G Spot. Start by inserting a finger into the vagina and point your fingers towards the front of the vaginal wall and move the tip of your finger in a small circle until your partner gives you the indication there is something exciting going on.

There are many products on the market to help you out. Adam&EVE and Amazon.comboth have great G spot vibrators. Happy Hunting!!!

This is a funny Bdsm game

2010-01-31T11:17:00.001-08:00

Tiger Wood's porn Video

2010-01-29T05:43:00.001-08:00

Tiger Wood's exploits have been hitting the news recntly and the industry delivers this Tiger spoof, Tyler's Wood. This is just the quality you have been expecting from Adam & Eve. When something happens like the Tiger wood's Scandal (s) top run porn producers are there to provide you with high quality porn spoofs. This runs 108 minutes and stars:
Tyler Knight, Evan Stone, Kayden Kross, Andi Anderson and Richelle Ryan. Enough scenes to steam you up and enough parody to keep you laughing. This should hold you over until the real Tiger Woods Sex tapes are available through "leaked" sources.

You can get Tyler's Wood porn dvd directly from Adam&Eve for $19.95 or instantly rent to your PC for $2.99 here.

Valentine's Day

2010-01-29T03:32:00.000-08:00

Valentine's Day is quickly approaching and that means millions of people will be stressed about what gift they should give or worse, which gift they won't be getting. What the hell do you get for Valentine's Day? Guys have problems with this so I will address these answers to you. I have have 5 suggestions to be the most romantic person this Valentine's Day.

1. Get a gift. This may sound stupid, but do IT! If your partner has said that Valentine's Day is just a greeting card holiday etc. pay no attention. Get a gift no matter how small. A little candy or a coffee.... anything. Do NOT be emptyhanded!

2. Romantic scents are a wonderful way to make her remember you even after the gift is given. WARNING: DO NOT GIVE SOAP OR SCENTED BODY WASH. Scented body wash means "you stink" to women. Women who are worried about a scent will wear perfume, so that's a cool gift.

"Hi, here's your vanilla bubble bath!" "Awesome" she replies.

"I know you like this perfume." "Awesome" She replies.

"Here is some body wash." "WTF.. do you think I stink?" She fumes.

3. Little things, little things, little things. Little things are not usually a girl's best friend, but they are yours when it comes to Valentine's Day gift giving. Comb your brain for that thing she said she liked or hasn't had in years. This proves you love her and pay attention to her. Even if it's a candy she ate when she was 4 she'll love you for it.

4. You are not just buying a gift for her. You are buying a gift that will be analyzed by her; Mother, sisters, sister in laws, in laws, co workers, friends, random people on the train or bus, future waiters and waitresses and perhaps members of the press so it is important to think of the impact this gift will have on those people as well. You might think it's cute to get some edible undies, but make sure it will pass the scrutiny of the masses.

5. Spend a TON of money or buy many gifts. This tactic should cover you either way. You can buy a ton of chocolate or buy her a BMW. This way she knows you love her and she can tell all the people that you bought her a BMW that was full of chocolate. That works with everyone.

I hope this helps you out. I know Valentine's Day is a cheesy holiday. It is good to take a little time to tell someone that you love them. Make it special, have a good time.

Stripper Pole Dad

2010-01-26T06:05:00.000-08:00

This guy decided to have a party for his underage son with drinks and a stripper pole. You know the kind of stuff you would get for high schoolers. Now, the trial looms and they are requesting a change of venue because stripper pole dad is such a common phrase on the internet. This occured in Northampton PA, near Allentown. I had never heard of this guy before today, but his lawyer says he is well known as the "stripper pole Dad".

I do not think you would get a fair trial anyway. I'm excited to see the defense in this one. It's really obvious this is wrong. I wonder what type of sympathetic jury they would expect? Life make me laugh so often.

There is some more of this story here

John Edwards Porn Video

2010-01-26T05:48:00.001-08:00

There is a report about former Vice Presidential candidate/ presidential hopeful John Edwards made a sex tape with Rielle Hunter his baby mama. Why does this info rise to the surface? IS someone trying to promote another "leaked" video on the internet? This is truly confusing. John Edwards was a very prominent Presidential candidate who cheated on his wife, fathered a child and made a video with Rielle. Confusing indeed.

I wonder what was going on during the 2004 campaign. The amount of sex possibilities must be extraordinary. I hope that tape comes out....DEM's gone wild!

I certainly do not have a problem with anyone making a sex tape. The use of cameras and twitter etc. means that an image can be spread very fast and Edwards should have been concerned with his image. I guess he really didn't give a shit. Morbid curiosity would lead many to locate this John Edwards sex tape if it ever comes out. I wonder if John Kerry would have a cameo. Just another Political fall from grace..... welcome to the sleaze world John Edwards.

Backdoor Buddy Anal Dildo Review

2010-01-25T11:02:00.000-08:00

The backdoor anal dildo is a slim latex dildo made especially for "backdoor" play. I have used other dildos for my own "backdoor" pleasure, but I had never used a dlido designed for anal play. I was never interested in butt plugs because I like the feeling of some movement during anal play.

This backdoor dildo is extremely flexible with a 7" shaft and a nice sized head approx 1.5 ". The nicest feature I feel is the handle on the end of this dildo. It is designed for maximum control and movement during anal play. The flexibility makes this dildo a little hard to insert solo, but I would imagine this dildo would be a lot of fun when used with someone else. The flexibility is useful when it comes to the action of this toy. The feeling was wonderful. I can't believe I never used a dildo designed for anal play before. It seems like an obvious thing if you like anal play.

I would recommend this toy for anyone male or female who would like some anal play in their life.

The Backdoor Buddy Anal Dildo sells for $12.95 and is rated 4 out of five stars by myself.

Buy Here

My name is Lacy and I am happy to be writing for the King. This little toy is my first sex toy review. Please be patient with me ;) You can follow me on twitter @netfux. I also have a Blog hornyandbored.blogspot.com

Teacher suspended over Facebook photos

2010-01-24T06:32:00.000-08:00

I really Can't believe this story. It's outrageous. I know teachers. They do one of the hardest jobs and are disrespected when it comes to pay Etc. Now this story. This teacher gets suspended for photos someone else posted on a facebook page. She is near a male stripper.

She was at a bachlorette party where the entertainment was a male stripper.

She is a human. What is this standard the Brownsville Area school district trying to uphold? I do not understand this which hunt. I know I deal with erotic and porn images everyday, but I have a hard time understanding why this is worthy of suspension. If she got a DUI would she be suspended? What is the basis for this.... unreal expectations for a teacher? A STRIPPER AT A BACHLORETTE PARTY???? ISn't that expected?
More of this story is here ===== > msnbc

2010-01-20T18:06:00.001-08:00

How to Female Ejaculate

2009-11-19T10:04:00.000-08:00

Does anyone know if female ejaculation can be a learn skill? If anyone would Nina Hartley would be able to find out. This DVD is a "how To" examination of female ejaculation. I can only hope it is true. Anyone use this?

Nice Bisexual Erotica

2009-10-29T07:39:00.000-07:00

She Made a Man Out of Me
by cris
I was 18 years old. I had myself a steady job shelving books for one of the last chain stores to not serve coffee. It was great time knowing everything. I was all consumed with writing, sex and drugs. Reading took up most of my time and that made my boss Tasha very mad.
Tasha was a beautiful big woman who travel along the train from the inner city. It was a tough commute and barely seemed worth the extra .75 she made an hour. It was probably the fact that she wasn't too worried she'd get robbed out here in the suburbs. She really didn't want anything to do with me at all. I was just some punk kid who believed he was on to bigger and better things above a beyond this retail shit that she had come to embrace as her life.
This changed one night.
I was into exploring all things. I wanted to be a writer so I was big into experiences. Reading Burroughs and wondering where I could get these wonderful happenings for myself. I ventured to an "artsy" town a few miles from the store. I had heard about the Falcon Bar many times over the years. This was a place that was always mentioned with some serious undertones. He/she was seen at the Falcon Bar type of phrases. You only had to look for the rainbow flags to understand this was a place where you could find what you might be looking for.
The Falcon Bar (as it was in my head) was the absolute best place to start some adventuring. I had heard that the place had expanded and now had a full kitchen. That means in my backward state that minors could be admitted yet not served alcohol. That was all the green light I needed.
I sat in my car and pretended to be patiently waiting and not agonizing over weather or not I should go in. I knew that I was curious about having sex with men but not curious enough to have sex with a man. I sat for a long time when fate intercepted. I saw my boss and a companion exit a truck parked not 20 feet from me. I wondered why she was here, but when she approached her friend I knew instantly she was gay. They both were looking around the parking lot and I know she saw me there. She stopped and looked for a split second and then moved on with her lover. I was uncomfortable enough to just start up the car and leave.
I felt more like Woody Allen then Burroughs.
The next time I worked I was nervous. I thought she would give me shit for going to "THAT GAY BAR". Even though she would have semi outed herself, she was that mean type of person. The next time we saw each other she was incredibly cordial. Just as nice as she could be and I really enjoyed working with her. It was like we had a little secret that we knew about each other. I knew she knew. she knew I knew and we were in that understanding type of relationship.
This went on for a few weeks and then it was announced she was leaving, moving to Boston. I was bummed because I started to enjoy the fact that I would always get blamed for sneaking the "Men's magazine" into the breakroom. I know it was her. That night at closing she and I were alone as usual and she mentioned that "her friend" had a job offer back home in Boston and they were excited about moving. I said I would be sad to see her go, but wished her well.
Two weeks later, there was obviously a problem with her plan. She was a wreck. She barely left her closet next to the employee bathroom they called her office. This continued for 2 days before a truck pulled into our lot and I recognized it immediately. Tasha's friend came out of the driver's side with a box and I recognized the box immediately too.
It was a "Goodbye Box". You know the last of your stuff that an ex lover gives you. That means it's final. Tasha's friend came into the store and headed straight back for the office. I noticed that there was a nice bottle of rum sticking out of the top of the box. Almost as quickly as she came Tasha's friend was gone.
I went back to the office door and knocked. I lied and said that I needed some change. Tasha obliged and then spoke. "Do you really want to do this? Have your life broken and not be able to tell anyone? This is the life of a "homosexual." She summoned someone else's words for that last part. There was some hatred in the tone of her voice that was not her own.
Weeks past and Tasha stayed on. If you are on a sinking ship that is your life, do you stop and fix your hair? We had inventory to do and that meant staying way late. People with kids and other working has built in excuses and we needed money so we were suckered into it.
We did a half assed job. The job took no time when two people do not give a shit. Tasha went to fax the final paperwork and returned with her rum. We took turns drinking from the bottle and between the first few hits on the bottle searched in vain for a mixer, then cups, then only a place to sit. We were well rested on the check out counter and just shooting the shit. The rum was hitting me. Do you think you are gay? Tasha rum hitting her as well. I do not know I replied to her question.
Tasha replied that she never knew either. Her eyes became glassy and she excused herself politely and then shouted I gotta pee at the top of her voice. I was drunk she was drunk. Experiences can happen this way.
She returned with a rolled joint and a wicked gleam in her eye. We smoked. Experience. Nice.
Tasha looked far younger than her 26 years this night. Her lovely breasts were big enough that even with her modest shirt she was showing enough to make me wonder what my dick might look like between them. The rum and weed made me not realize how long I was looking at her breasts and Tasha replied with "want some?" I replied yes... without thinking. I'm into pussy was her response. The slickest moment of my 18 years came out of my mouth and I said... So am I.
We started to make out and I enjoyed her natural BBW aggressive lesbian type kisses. She was almost my height and certainly out weighed me. We endlessly searched each other's mouths with our tongues, our hand were searching everywhere to give each other the pleasure we had no idea we had been searching for. I started to unbutton her blouse. She paused and I stopped. I was so nervous. We were high. We were stoned and I had no idea I would be making out with my BBW boss. It started to feel weird. I said I had to pee and left to use the bathroom. I didn't want to turn the bright lights on so I left the door to the back room open to let light in. I bought time. There was no way I could've peed with the huge boner I had. I just do not like awkward situations.
I left the bathroom and Tasha was outside the door waiting for me. She grabbed me and forced her tongue down my throat. She pulled me close and plunged her hand down the front of my pants. Nice cock she said. She grabbed my hand and pulled it to her crouch, do you like mine? Under her jeans I could feel a rock hard dildo.
I told you I like pussy and I know you like cock. She backed me up and sat me down in a chair. She unzipped the front of her pants and let her strap on cock out for play. She stroked my face and in a gentle way said, I'm going to fuck your face and then when you have done a good job I'm going to fuck your pussy good. In this light she was a BBW goddess with a strapon. She could have asked me anything. I was so high.
The next thing I knew this strap on cock was thrusting in my mouth. It was wild. The taste of this dildo was one of old pussy, lube and cardboard. I never thought anything would taste so good. Tasha was very experienced with her strap on. She was thrusting her hips at me like she owned that cock, and my face. She let out loud moans as she told me to, suck her cock. Her hands on the back of my head pushing me into her and pulling me back as she moaned was ecstasy.
She pulled me off of her cock and it glimmered in the dim light. She pulled me up and kissed me hard. Now I'm going to fuck your pussy. Take off your pants get on the table. She went over to her box and I took off my pants and freed my own rock hard cock. I never knew my first anal experience would be with a bbw with a strap on. I got onto the table on my knees with my ass facing her.
Not this way she said and flipped me so I was facing her. I want to fuck your pussy she said. I was a little confused. She started kissing me again and I felt her hand trace my body. She touched the inside of my thighs and around my ass. I was totally hers. She continued kissing me and removed her hand from my leg. I could feel the strapon hitting my leg. She touched her cock to mine and slipped her hand towards my hole.
I felt cold lube hit my ass and the jolt was shocking. She made small circles with her finger lubing up my tight ass. She slipped her finger inside me and began to move back and forth. It drove me wild. She was kissing me this whole time and brought her cock towards my aching ass. I wanted her inside me. She pushed the head of her cock against me and rocked her hips back and forth. My ass opened and took her inside of me. I felt full of her. She pounded me with hard heavy strokes that left me feeling like I had no cock anymore. Just the feeling of her inside me. She was fucking me and it was great.
I couldn't believe she was pounding me the way she was. Like a guy. Fucking me like she needed to come. She was bucking wildly and she was moving back and forth. She was moaning with orgasmic pleasure and the sounds of her coming made me come so hard my whole body shook with pleasure. She collapsed on top of my and kept her strapon cock inside me. Her heaviness was fulfilling. She pulled her cock out and simply said, that was good.
I stayed up going over my experience over and over. Mostly because my legs would not stop shaking. My life moved on and Tasha and I never did anything with each other since that one wonderful night. I never thought I would have had a bbw strapon experience. This was something I will never forget. Even to this day the smell of cardboard makes me smile.
If you are Tasha or want to talk about anything my name is cris and I can be reached at crispenriversedge@yahoo.com

Setting the Sexy Mood at Home for little $$$

2009-10-27T12:47:00.000-07:00

One of the easiest ways to enhance a romantic life is to "set a mood" in your bedroom or other area of sexual delight. Many hotels cater toward the "couples retreat" and have suite designed for a fun couples night out. Many of these places can run from $100 a night (on a weekday) to the sky is the limit. Private pools and hot tubs are the norm in most of these romantic hideaways. How can you really afford a romantic get away with those prices?

Set the mood yourself. It's really not too hard to transform your mundane bedroom into a romantic scene. There are a few things that you will need.
1) Candles Candles are the easiest way to set the romantic mood. You light a few tea lights and your room in already in the mood for you to get into yours.

2) Scent Inscense works best... Not your old New car scent you had hanging on your mirror. Go for something not too strong and try and light the inscense a while before so you will have a nice but not overpowering scent.

3) Music Sound is an important part of sex life that is usually overlooked. A nice low volume song or a relaxing nature sound will do the trick nicely.

Get out to the dollar store and pick some things up to set the mood for a little lovin in your life.

Sexy Gifts for Bachelorette Parties!

2009-10-25T06:03:00.000-07:00

The best bachelorette gifts are the ones that make everyone laugh. It's very true. If you want your girl to remember her night forever the absolute best gifts are the ones that make them laugh and blush. This is no time to be timid. The bachelorette party is one of the most fun girl's nite out there is so please DO NOT Disappoint.

No excuses now it's time to get sexy!

Best sexy gifts for the bride to be:

Books and Sexy guides. Easy and will give the best laughs because everyone will share in the fun. Sexy books for the bride to be gets some serious laughs and eyebrow raising. This bachorlette gift will allow the fun to continue as it gets passed around and everyone can share something from the book and laugh (or take some notes ;) ).

There are many great sites for Adult gifts here is one I have found. Adam & Eve Is one of the most trusted company out there with regards to adult products.
Check out the Books on their site by clicking here

How well do you know the bride to be? You can always be very naughty for your girl and send her into married bliss with some backup. Vibrators and sex toys are always a suitable bachelorette gift. The bride to be enjoys her last night of being single with her friends showering her with great gifts and there are many great vibrators to choose from here.

Want to be shocking? Really open the eyes of the bride to be? Get her a gag gift for her bachelorette she'll never forget! Like the King Dong DILDO. It is the largest dildo that you can buy! Guaranteed to make even the kinkiest bachelorette blush. Simply take a look at this MONSTER SEX TOY!

You should always remember to add in the sexy extras that make the Bachlorette gifts the life of the party. Lubes, condoms, and all of the other "little things" that are always expected to accompany the main gift. Most of these items can be combined to make a suitable gift by themselves. Pick up some sexy extras to fill out your bride to be's gift bag.

Adam & Eve is a huge help for all adult gifts and they even have a section on helping you find gifts. You can check out their Sexy Gift Ideas section for them to help out if you are still stuck on what to get your bachlorette. Why do they not have these parties for divorcees? Good Luck finding your gift!

Saturday night oblivion

2009-10-25T03:28:00.001-07:00

Yowzers. It's bad when the night starts off with the idea you just want some sleep and you will rest. Then comes an email from people you haven't seen, then it's a few drinks and then that debate over "Is it better to stay up or get 2 hours of sleep. Never ending struggles. I know that it will get better. I will post more when i get coffee.

Adult Toys affiliate Marketing

2009-10-23T03:06:00.001-07:00

Adult toys and porn in general is a huge industry on the internet. That is common knowledge, but how can you cash in on getting and maintaining an internet porn presense? Simple.

Affiliate marketing. What is affiliate marketing? You selling products for someone else for a commission. Sell Adult DVDs or sex toys online and you make the money and never deal with actually having to handle product shipping and all of the other hassles of selling merchandise.

When I tell people I sell adult toys they usually ask if I host one of those "toy parties". I always laugh because I think those parties to get people to buy things are really ridiculous. Do you really want to tell strangers about your personal choices in vinrators? FACE TO FACE? With your co workers? Seems too much for myself and my other online friends selling sex toys online.

Adult affiliate programs are really easy to find. Ones that work and will continue to offer the support and accurate reporting..... and ACTUALLY pay you is difficult. When starting in this business I had some very rough starts untill I went with my gut and was approved to be an affiliate of Adam and Eve. Simply the best program out there and THEY PAY. Easy to set up on your blog or site and a VERY trusted name in the business. You can sign up at this link:
Make $$

Romantic strip club

2009-10-22T03:45:00.000-07:00

It's been far too long since I have had a decent post. The summer time has way too many real world distractions to sit down and look over a screen for myself. Last night the Queen and I took a much needed night out.
Flustered for something that would stimulate ourselves we ventured into the local strip club for some adult entertainment. We went to http://www.creeksidecabaret.com/ . In our area of Pennsylvania there are quite a number of decent night out options for the sex positive crowd. We are close to Philadelphia and even Atlantic City is not too far for a late night excursion. This club located in Colmar off of 309 is simply the best choice for couples looking for the sexy night out that won't cost you an arm or leg and actually delivers on a "good" atmosphere.

Creekside Cabaret is located in an industrial park which lends a little shadiness to the place. It's still nice that the club has a little mystique in this respect. I really do not want a strip club that feels like I'm going into an applebee's. The club now has a full bar and that was the reason she and I had not gone back from our first trip a few years back. In Pa when a club serves alcohol there can no longer be full nude dancing. Such a shame. I was worried this club would turn into the dive bars that are synonymous with shitty performers. One was actually refered to as the "shitty titty" lovinglyby the locals.

When we entered the club last night I was hopeful because it still looked the same. It's a converted warehouse that actually took some time to make it look like a real club. The huge stage with 3 poles and lights that dance along with the actual good looking women in this place makes you feel as though you were in someplace other than a philadelphia suburb titty bar.

Fantastic dancers that actually dance. Pole climbing, splits, the whole nine yards is done for your approval. Great place to take the wife (wives, girlfriend, her girlfriend, your girlfriends girlfriend and her boyfriend etc) because the dancers are not begging for your attetion. They are complete professionals and not just out to stick their tits in your face to get your dollar.

Why don't strip clubs give $2 bills for change? It would double their dancers money.

Absolutely recommended for the couple who wants a little romantic spike in their lives. Quick drive from Lansdale, hatfield, quakertown, allentown, warminster, willow grove and SOOOOO worht the trip. Check them out http://www.creeksidecabaret.com/ I am back for a little bit. The Phillies are in the world series so......

Trying trying trying

2009-10-20T06:46:00.000-07:00

To Really remember the Summer. I really miss those beautiful days.

working on expanding my site

2009-07-29T10:07:00.001-07:00

I'm really looking to include some really nice pictures on my site. It should be rad.

Condom to last longer!

2009-03-26T06:17:00.001-07:00

Ok Ok. I have been married for quite some time and lately the days have been exhausting and really those days of long hot sex have been replaced with quicker sessions before we collapse into our coma. I had been afraid of trying anything that would "desensitze" or delay "climax" just because I am very fearful of problems that could come (sorry) from that. I mean I love my wife and would like nothing more than to make her pass out from exctasy, but I really do not want her to finish and I have a raging hard on I can't even feel. These condoms from adam & eve really work well. I could still feel everything and it was nice to be able to control my orgasm alot better. Now guys will not admit this, but it felt like I was younger when I had a much better control over my orgasms. This would be fantastic if you use condoms for birth control... why not at this price. Also it would be a nice little treat for your special person. Why not? Who wouldn't like a longer night of love?

Largest Dildo on the market!

2009-01-06T16:13:00.001-08:00

King Dong!! 15 inches long and wider than it should be. (?) This monster dildo is for the girls and guys who like a LOT more to their dildos. THIS IS HUGE!!!! It's made by Doc Johnson so you know the quality is at it's best. What you see is what you get. If someone out there believes this is an easy toy to use lookout... this one is a project to keep you up all night(s). This has to be the Largest Dildo on the market!

Buy Now

InTERActive Tera Patrick's InTERActive DVD.

2008-12-29T16:20:00.000-08:00

Bored with Porn? This interactive dvd allows you to control the story in Tera Patrick's InTERActive DVD. This DVD can be a new adventure every time you break it out. Great gift for couples who are bored with the everyday porn. Great innovative DVD!!

penis pump!!!

2008-12-29T12:08:00.000-08:00

Great pegging positions!

2008-12-25T16:13:00.000-08:00

Try a traditional spooning position with the female behind the male. This position allows gentle penetration and keeps both partners in comfortable positions for first time pegging.

Over a couch or chair is also a great way to start pegging. Allow for time and patience for both partners to get used to the role reversal that is needed......

Lube is necessary. Always be safe. Try the best lube for pegging.

Need other Supplies? Go Here!

Feeldoe - Why it's the best toy.......

2008-12-22T07:28:00.000-08:00

I have always wondered if anyone would come along with a brand new type of sex toy. There are many basic sex toys that seem to have everything covered. Vibrating, large, small and I never really thought something would be different. What could possibly be done? The Feeldoe.

Feeldoe is simply an inovation in sex toys. This dildo is worn internally and acts as a strap on or a fantastic double dildo. I was very sceptical at first because I have used double dildos and strap ons before. Really what was the feeldoe, just another toy to add to the arsenal. Using the Feeldoe one time proved to me that no other strap on or double dildo would be needed again.

The Feeldoe is not a strap on toy although it certainly be used as one. The shape of a Feeldoe allows both partners to have fun at the same time. This innovation has opened up so many doors in the bedrooms of many sexually exploring couples. The shape and clitoral bumps make EVERY touch, stroke etc. be felt. Most role reversal fantasy involve some sort of oral play with the Feeldoe a woman can experience sensations while getting sucked.

That is truly what sets the Feeldoe apart from other double dildos or strap ons the ability to FEEL. The innovation of the Feeldoe is taking a double dildo and sculpting it to make a powerful controlling harness-less strapon. Beautiful. FEELDOE -- BEST PEGGING TOY ON THE MARKET!!

Teacher I'd Like to F*ck dvd

2008-12-21T07:10:00.000-08:00

Great couples adult DVD. TILF provides some fun scenes for all of the fans of classy adult entertainment. Over 10.000 sold!!! Score another one for adam & eve for great quality!!

Couples Sexual variations DVD

2008-12-19T10:18:00.000-08:00

Couples porn DVDs are my favorite genre of adult movies. Long term relationships can become a bit tedious especially as the years roll by. How can you be put in a good mood by watching porn for young adults? Spice up your married life with some variations. This DVD dives into the world behind closed doors so you can bring a little excitement back into your bed. Enough sex scenes to get you going and very educational for hours of enjoyment. Try something new or see how to do what you are doing better!

Slave sex cage

2008-12-18T09:19:00.000-08:00

This is where people need to go to be trained a little better. Cute...Strong cage for the little fantasy we all enjoy playing with from time to time. Three separate doors that can be padlocked or opened for fun. Folds away nicely for secrecy and can be used lying down! This is the real deal for real sex play.
SEX JAIL!

Great Sex During pregnancy DVD

2008-12-18T08:54:00.001-08:00

Pregnancy Porno? No. This EDUCATIONAL DVD is a wonderful tool for the couple who is pregnant. Nina Hartley helped us through the pregnancy time in our marriage. Horny pregnancy can be a frustrating time for both partners (we went through enough crap to fill up many blogs) as the hormone levels in the mother go crazy. This DVD goes through a very visual tutorial of how to have great sex while pregnant. Guys.... this is an acceptable adult gift for your special pregnant lady, make her feel beautiful. Girls .... get this and pass on to your best girlfriends, great baby shower sex gift!!!
p.s. Craving sex during a pregnancy is supposed to indicate you are carrying a girl.. in our case it was right :)

How to use Strap on DVD

2008-12-17T17:49:00.000-08:00

Here it is a total Strap On instructional DVD from the sex guru Nina Hartley. This 90 minute DVD covers the basics of starting to bring a strap on into your bedroom life. If you ever wondered what using a strap on in your sex life would be like this is your DVD. There is a fantastic pegging scene with TJ Hart taking her boyfriend with a strap on. Great way to break the pegging ice girls!!!

Learn about Strap Ons DVD is simply the best of the best!

Half OFF SALE!!

2008-12-16T16:20:00.000-08:00

BBW Strap On UP TO 60" waist!!!!!!!!

2008-12-16T14:57:00.000-08:00

Bend Over Beginner Harness Kit Details

Harness can adjust to fit up to a 60-inch waist!!!!!!!

BIG GIRL'S STRAP ON FUN IS HERE!
Get ready to bend over and take it! Kit includes 2 dildos, mini vibe, and adjustable velvet harness! Contains 100% ultra-premium platinum silicone – the highest quality on the market!
One of the best harness kits we’ve seen in a long time, the Bend Over Beginners kit comes jampacked with everything you need for experimenting with strap-on sex or role reversal!
The two silicone dildos included in the kit are specifically sized so you can break in your partner easily and gradually. Start off with the 4.5 inch model before graduating to his bigger brother – the 5.5 incher!
Both dildos slide firmly into a rubber O-ring, which you can then snap securely into place on the adjustable velvet harness – keeping it locked in place no matter how passionate the two of you get!

To add to your pleasure, the harness includes a special pocket directly over your clit to hold an adjustable speed bullet vibrator, also included. Not only does the mini vibe keep you every bit as turned on as your partner, but you can even access the controls while thrusting away to turn up the heat so to speak!

When you’re ready to graduate to something bigger, the kit also includes an O-ring that can be switched out to accommodate larger-sized dildos like the VIP Purple Haze dildo – ensuring that you and your partner will be using this harness kit for years to come!
The smaller silicone dildo measures 4.5 inches long and less than 1 inch wide, while the larger is 5.5 inches long and 1.25 inches wide. Both dildos feature a smooth, clean surface. They’re firm enough to hold up to even the most rigorous sessions, and become incredibly slick with water-based or anal lube for easy penetration while maximizing your pleasure and comfort.
The two dildos in the Bend Over Beginner Harness Kit are both made from ultra-premium platinum silicone – the highest grade of silicone available in the adult toy market – to ensure that your new adult sex toy will give you years of satisfaction and pleasure with a minimal amount of care. Silicone sex toys are some of the safest and healthiest toys in the adult market due to their hypoallergenic, odorless, phthalate free and non-toxic properties.

Adult sex toys made from silicone are also easier to clean than those made from other materials. You can wash your silicone dildos in soap and water like other adult toys, but you can also dip it in a pot of boiling water or the dishwasher for a more thorough cleaning. The velvet harness is machine washable so you can just throw it in with the rest of your laundry
Available in purple.
Harness can adjust to fit up to a 60-inch waist.

Plus sized Strap On for the BBW

2008-12-16T10:51:00.001-08:00

This Beautiful Plus sized strap on harness is simply a well built strap on. This one has leather straps that give a SNUG fit and can be adjusted to fit a size 48" waist comfortably. The BBWs out there who want to use a strap on but can never find one that fits comfortably and still is tight enough to keep the fun going in the moments when control is needed this strap on is for you. GREAT CONTROL for pegging too. Any size waist will feel great using this strap on for a little role reversal or even some great parties :) The dong is nice and you can still use some of your favorite attachments with this wonder. Makes a GREAT GIFT for the special BBW in your life. COME ONE COME ALL sounds like a nice night to me............

Plus Sized strap on.

2008-11-24T06:44:00.000-08:00

Affordable REAL DOLL FEEL

2008-11-20T17:45:00.001-08:00

Here is the real deal. Cyberskin is designed to give the most lifelike feel to your toys. This is a replica of a pussy and ass that will go on for years. No other toys are needed when you bring this bad boy home. Just check out the site!

RUDE BOY Guy's G Spot Vibrator

2008-11-20T17:35:00.000-08:00

This little gem is a wonderful addition to your sex toy arsenal. The design of this toy is to drive the man or men in your life wild. Prostate stimulation in a toy specifically for men.

Fantasy Japanese Ropes

2008-11-20T17:28:00.000-08:00

Experience the fun and unique pleasure of Japanese rope fantasy play. These comfy and safe wrist and ankle restraints will add breathtaking excitement to your lovemaking. Whether you’re in command or not – discover an erotic new way to enjoy sex. Fully adjustable, these silky-soft cuffs fit all and are easy to fasten and remove. Friction free buckles won’t fray or damage rope. Comes with FREE 16 page color instructional booklet on sexy role-playing games for couples. Choose Purple or Red. These bargain bondage toys are a must for an adventurous couple.

The cone Vibrator

2008-11-20T16:51:00.000-08:00

The Cone Revolution is here!!! Sick and tired of the standard dildo and vibrator toys? Here is something new from the great people and innovators of sex toys Doc Johnson. The Cone is as wonderful as your imagination allows. SWEEEEEET!!!! The Cone.

Sarah Palin porn spoof

2008-11-20T10:33:00.000-08:00

This has to be the first porn movie featuring a faux Republican Vice Presidential nominee, unless there is some crazy Bob Dole porn from the '70's. This election season was one of the most interesting in years and even porn is getting involved. This is another wonderful cross over porn that everyone talking about the political porn genre that may have just been created!!!!

Scene 1: Gov. Paylin works on her foreign relations with two Russian soldiers – bending over backward to suck Sascha’s hard cock while Mick Blue pumps her curvy rear until they pop all over her smiling face and glasses!
Scene 2: While Paylin gets grilled by the press, her hubby Alec is busy breaking in their newest intern! After some tongue magic, Holly West hops on his lap and drops down on his cock ass first for anal cowgirl!
Scene 3: Decked out in her Miss Alaska sash and tiara, Paylin’s ready to get drilled! She treats her husband’s friend Lee Stone to a gubernatorial cock gobbling before jumping in his lap for a cowgirl ride while her bra-busting melons bounce more than her poll numbers!
Scene 4: Daydreaming about simpler times, Paylin remembers an afternoon study session with her old political professor Evan Stone. SinDee Jennings (playing a young Paylin) bares her bald box for a tongue-wagging lecture before he bends her over the desk and taps her tight behind to show her how the system works!
Scene 5: Paylin and Hillary (Nina Hartley) get together for some bipartisan caucusing… only to get busted by an angry Condi (Jada Fire) for starting without her! Joining in the fun, Condi feeds Hillary a vibrator while the senator stuffs Paylin’s ballot box with her fingers before both babes tag-team Condi with her own toy!

One of the best pornos in years!!!

Prostate Massager

2008-11-18T10:17:00.000-08:00

Great angle to go where it is needed. A little lube and you are on your way!!! Guys.... if you have never had a prostate orgasm you need to try this little guy. The most intense orgasms are achieved through the prostate. Girls help your guy out!

Ultimate Pegging Toy - Feeldoe

2008-11-18T06:24:00.000-08:00

There are many questions about which pegging toys are the best. The pegging crowd has been asking which strap on will fit their waist, which strap on is best for control when pegging, which one is easiest to use? All of these questions are valid. Who wants to stop and put on a strap on while in the midst of working some fantasy play? I know the BBW Strap ons for pegging can be confusing because you do not have the ability to try many different sizes of strap ons. Maybe the strap ons are the problem with pegging. Here is the answer....don't use a strap on for pegging.....

Feeldoe is the best innovation in sex toy technology since ..... umm batteries? This strap on isn't a strap on, it's a double dildo for pegging or pounding your partner. The 4" bulb fits inside your vagina and allows you to thrust away with a real feel stimulation and some vibration for extra fun. Now here are the wonderful pegging problem solvers the feeldoe offers.
Peggers Ask:

What strap on allows best control for pegging?

Feeldoe lets you control your pegging with your own muscles so you are in entire control. There will be no stopping to adjust straps etc. It is also a more natural feeling experience.

What type is good BBW strap on?
Feeldoe is worn internally. A feeldoe is good for any size woman since it doesn't go around your waist, you can be a big woman and still use this toy to peg your man.

Feeldoe is easily the best non strap on strap on toy on the market. Wonderful experience for all the experimenters out there.
Happy Pegging!!!!

Pinstriped Babydoll

2008-11-17T08:01:00.001-08:00

wow. Hot Lingerie.. Way hot. Beautiful.

G spot rabbit vibrator

2008-11-17T07:44:00.000-08:00

Rabbit vibrators are some of the best selling and widely known adult products out there. Women all over have been singing praises for the rabbit vibrator which focuses the vibrations right on the clit where it's needed. This G Spot rabbit vibrator is not satisfied with just clit vibration , it's goes for the G Spot! This is the one to get to send you to the stars.... Guys don't pass this one up. What a great gift!!!!

Strap On Vagina

2008-11-17T04:59:00.000-08:00

Gender bending toys usually are for women. Now comes a strap on vagina that allows the guys to have some fun with sex roles. This toy hides the penis and is completely penetrable. Yes, you can strap on this vagina and strut and be PENETRATED!!!! Wonderful. I think Strap On Vagina is a name that needs some work...what? I do not know, but it seems it needs a better maybe classier name. These little gems are hand molded for the most realistic and beautiful sex toys out there. STRAP ON VAGINA!!!!

Advanced Clitoral Pump

2008-11-16T03:41:00.000-08:00

This IS ADVANCED people so pay attention. This is not for your weak sex sessions. This Clit Pump is for those who like to take it slow. Every straight couple hates this one because it takes time and does not work as quick as your average d battery powered mini jack hammer. This pump is designed for those who want SLOW enjoyment. Best used solo or by someone who would really like to see your clit pleasured. It takes time but once you get there you are going for the best you can get. Suction where you need it and vibration to guide you to the best orgasms of your life. Straight girls you may need to show the guys how to use it first. Guys let her take a hot bath first and get ready to do some slow work, this clit pump will work wonders if you sit back and let her enjoy it.

I <3 BJ Kit

2008-11-16T03:31:00.000-08:00

This little surprise will be the ultimate gift for the man (men) in your life. A Blow Job is one of the classics that keeps on giving. This sexy play kit contains flavors such as Whin-ahh-mint, Sin-a-mint, X-Sper-a-mint and Choc-ohh-mint. Minty fresh oral and some nice tips for better oral sex..... oh yeah. Also works wonders for his reciprication.... is it better to give or recieve. Come on people do both. Minty sex is best!

Water Proof prostate massager

2008-11-15T07:41:00.000-08:00

Prostate vibrator that is waterproof!!! Hours of shower fun, great G spot stimulation too!!! angled to go exactly where you need to go for the ultimate orgasm experience. Truely for the bold adventurers. Great starter for pegging the husband! Happy exploring!!!!!

Open My Pussy garter

2008-11-12T05:54:00.000-08:00

This is something I am very proud to provide. A device for the aid of eating pussy. Oral sex can be very difficult with the skin involved and keeping your fingers working while going to town just gets tiring. With this garter there is no more worries about keeping the vagina open. This looks fun and cheap!! One of the least expensive sex enhances around, goes great with some lingerie.

Start spreading the love.

Ass Finger sleeve

2008-11-11T05:58:00.000-08:00

Really? Just Looking at this sleeve sex toy makes me wonder what sex technology (sexnology, sextech?) research went into this on. This is either the creepiest sex toy or the best ever invented. I do not not know which way I'm going on this one. Male sex toys are definetely lacking in diversity... maybe this one is better? Hmmmm yeah. More here if interested.

Real Feel Dildo

2008-11-10T08:01:00.000-08:00

The worst part about sex toys is their ability to feel real. They are nice toys and usually you will have a good time with them, but it's the natural feeling that really gets you going. This New Iron Maidens Dildo from Anabolic goes for the ultra realistic with this dildo. The best part is the price. Get the cyber skin life like dildo feel for not so much $$$. I'm sure these are going to fly off the shelves. Great Holiday dildo! Try it out for Thanksgiving!